Josh · Kiiffner

Fuck, im so depressed.. my life is fine right now.. i just hate it so much. There is so much to do and I do none of it. Fuck me. There is only one person right now that could make me truly happy and she lives a little distance away which really sucks. Now its just me and my life with only a few happy moments every once in a while.. idk maybe im asking for too much.. really i think its just my mind. At the same time though.. it makes me realize how much i love life and how crazy it really is. I just want to make the best of it, but there is something keeping me from doing that. Laziness? Too scared? Hesitant? Stupid? Something like that. I just feel so outside of reality. I can't think of getting older.. its way too depressing for me.. seriously.. I'm only 20 and i already want to tell everyone not to ever grow up. Its scary, the constant change of time. I really need to find a pause button to life, or a slow-mo button. Thats really exactly what i need at the second. Why do we have to run on fast forward?

Oh and don't ever forget the people around you. They are so important. I love you all to death even though there is really no one reading this, but thank you if you are. I wish I had more people in my life that actually cared, but its alright, I have a couple and thats fine with me. I just need that one person..

Work.. Was.. BUSY! I was seriously sweating half of the night just bar backing. Saw soo many people.. pretty fun, but dramatic night. Dramatic haha.. I don't know how I thought of that.. By the way Im blazed as hell off some piff which made the night a little better for everyone.. Basically every single person that worked other than the bar tenders and even them, were soo pissed because no one got a good tip at all at the end because our tipping system if fucked up. Everyone busted their ass and the bus boys got like $25 for 4:45 - 2 and it was the grand opening. Doesn't make sense huh? I didn't stop moving the whole night.. I get my tips tomorrow and It better be a decent amount for bar backing all night at three different bars.

The night ended pretty well though.. got some piff and everyone was happy. AND no work tomorrow. What am I going to do? Oh yeah.. go get some TIPS! Remeber kids, Tip your bartender.

Fuck, i wish i updated this thing more.. i just want memories. Pictures are good too, but since i got my digital camera (nikon D70s) stolen from my room along with my ipod 2 months ago its been pretty hard developing film for my bronica since I'm broke (not after today!), so the last couple moths have been memory-less.

It sucks... i've felt pretty useless and i feel like I've wasted a lot of life, especially having no job and not going to school but its alright.. I'm not gonna look back on it. Plus i just got a bangin job at this sports bar around the corner form me called All Stars.. Its pretty legit. If your ever around central jersey right by trenton you should check it out. If you smoke, we have an outdoor patio with a bar overlooking a man-made lake and not only that, but its heated. Well anyways, as of now, im just bus/bar back and im going to be making probably almost $200 in tips every day aside from regular pay.. maddd cake. Also, about every single one of my friends works there so its not going to be bad working there at all. Oh.. and grand opening is today, which means after work.. is going to be nuts. Can't wait. It's almost like Christmas since i haven't had money for so long..

Another reason its going to be like Christmas is because I'm finally going to be able to drive again.. that's going to change a lot. Trust me when i say that. I want to travel so bad. Anyone want to go on a vacation with me?

Going to get in the shower now.. work 4:45 - 1

Thanks to Kayla Mraz for the inspiration to update this thing haha<33

"Love the life you live, Live the life you love"

So i haven't updated in over a year.. how lame am I? Im just lazy and don't have all the time in the world to do it. Well thats going to change now.. i hope. So here is a couple photos for you to enjoy.


We went to an abandoned mini golf course to skate, yes mini golf courses have things to skate. Seriously how creative are skateboarders? Well, here is what turned out from it.





And here is the moon from the other night. I took this for someone special. I wish she lived closer.

Wow I haven't been on here for so long. The only reason i really did was because this cute girl Christina found myne and commented me last night so i went on and now im in school changing stuff around and decided to update it a bit. Well to update, not much has changed except I'm probably getting a job finally at shop rite because I really need to save up money for a car/camera. Those are the two things I am going to probably be using the most this summer. I can't wait to get either of the two and once I get them both I will be out hopefully most of the time and I may go on tour either with Elle to shoot photos and stuff or with Dillon, Arjun, Pat, Joe, Zach, and others from slide clothing. It should be fun. Oh and check out Slide Clothing everyone (who ever is actually reading this). They have some sweet shirts and everything is 50% off right now so go support them! Last weekend was amazing too. Saturday we went to philly to go see Elle. and they played a sick show. I snapped a few photos that came out alright and it was fun. You can check out the photos either on my photo bucket or on their myspace. I have to go to 2nd period now. Later